Dedicating my Shivaratri to the women!

Shivaratri to me has always been about evening walk to Pashupati, Shivaji’s Prasad;) , Babaji, bonfire, street vendors and flow of human crowd.

Crowd  seen during Shivaratri
PC: trekkingnepalhimalaya.wordpress.com

I remember the time, years ago, when public were allowed to enter the premises of Pashupati on Shivaratri without any restriction. Me and my family would go to Pashupati for evening stroll. Maa used to bargain for falam ko bhada while me and my siblings compelled Baba buy us colorful Murali (flute), balloons and cotton candy.

We still follow our Shivaratri ritual but this year, unlike me, everyone in my family already had something planned out. Maa was complaining about having to go to work even on a holiday while brother left early for some volunteer work he was doing at Pashupati. My younger sister was also all dressed up to go to Pashupati with her friends. I stayed home and did some household chores. Since the time I have been engaged in 9 to 5 job, I have come to realize the beauty of staying home doing nothing. Gham tapdai suntala khane pani thulo kura bhako cha!

Today afternoon while I was onto some sun basking, I saw a guy staring at me. This guy was one of the construction workers in the house next to mine. I tried to ignore him for a while, but he was still looking. In a situation like this, I have come up with a strategy to look right back at them in anger until their prying eyes look away. Well the strategy did work for a while but when I looked away, he would be staring again.

Similar incident had happened to me few days ago when I caught another guy (another construction worker) staring through my window. Due to boiling anger, I had absentmindedly blown a punch in air with an annoyed expression and then closed the curtain (feeling Sunny Deol u know! lol :P).

I was really bothered by these incidents, so I called a friend of mine asking for a suggestion to stop this. I also shared about the ‘stare back’ strategy I used on this guy today. However, it was shocking for me to hear that my friend thought I might have provoked the guy and also given an impression that I was interested in him. I know my friend was just trying to warn me for good but it’s really surprising how quickly we become judgmental about a woman’s action in the name of keeping them safe.

Getting back to Shivaratri…me and my friends did go for evening walk today. The excitement of seeing cotton candy, balloon and colorful flute in the streets during Shivaratri was just as it used to be when I was a kid. Another thing that has remained the same is the harassment women have to face during Shivaratri. While walking on the crowded street especially in and around the Pashupati area, staring, ‘accidentally’ pushing, touching, making explicit comments and laughing are completely normal for the perpetrators and I don’t think there would be a single woman who has not been through similar experience.

Eve teasing or catcalling as we say it is an offensive act and a form of harassment. Women are always at its risk, be it in a public vehicle, streets, or any other public place. I myself have been a victim of it, which has caused me mental distress for a long time. In such situation, we usually tend to just gulp down the anger in shame and embarrassment and not speak out against it, fearing the consequences of our action. Since the government also does not have strong law against eve teasing in Nepal, a woman who is confident enough to fight back is instead blamed for her appearance which actually is a lame excuse because how a woman chooses to dress is not the cause, but a sick minded man is.

Every time we women have such bitter experience, we start to think it might have been our fault and some might even wish they were born a man. We also have the 'should’ve..', 'could’ve..' moments later on when we realize the things we must have said and done at that time. 

It's high time we stop compromising and start fighting against any form of violence against women. Thought I myself am not a fight-back type, this women’s day I make a pledge to speak out and not keep the suffering to myself. Women should get the respect they deserve and not be mistreated in anyway, anywhere, be it in their home, public place or workplace. The society and state should ensure support from their level for ending any form of violence against women and men. Men and women should be made aware about gender based violence and gender equality starting from their schools though education because only with the foundation of education and awareness, empowerment is possible. 

Let us raise our voices to stop violence against women and men because the power of change is in our hands! 

Deadly Zika!

The deadly Zika virus has been creating a swirl worldwide and has been a subject of concern for everyone at the moment. Few days ago I heard my fellow coworkers getting quite curious about the virus which resulted in poorly developed head in children. However, they weren’t quite sure about what it actually is and how it is transmitted. So, here I am, taking a moment to write on the must know information about Zika virus.

Originate: Zika virus was discovered in 1947 and in 1952, the first human cases of Zika were detected. Zika virus is named after the Zika forest in Uganda.

Causative Agent: The virus Zika is the member of Flaviviridae family. This virus usually remains in the human blood for about a week after infection.

Areas affected: Although there have been number of reported cases of Zika in the tropical Africa, Southeast Asia and the Pacific Islands in the past, the virus outbreak in 2015 has resulted in declaration of public health emergency of international concern (PHEIC) by WHO since the confirmation of the virus infection in Brazil on 1^st February, 2016. It is highly likely to spread on other territories/countries in the days to come.

Mode of transmission: The Zika virus is spread mainly through the bite of an infected Aedes aegypti Mosquito. However, there have also been evidences that indicate human to human transmission of the virus through unsafe sex.

Symptoms: The symptoms are quite similar to that of flu. Fever, redness of eye, pain in the joint and rashes are common after the virus infection.

PC Antonio Lacerda/EPA

Zika in pregnant women: Consequences of Zika virus is very severe among pregnant woman as the virus can spread from the mother to the fetus. The virus is capable of causing serious congenital birth defect called microchephaly in the babies that are born from pregnant women who are infected by the virus. This defect causes the child’s head/brain to be less than its normal expected size.

Pregnancy after virus infection: As I mentioned earlier, the virus usually remains in the human blood only during the first week of infection. But, planning for pregnancy in future should only be done after consultation with the health service providers.

Prevention and Treatment: Currently, there isn’t any vaccine or medicines available against Zika. However, implementation of preventive public health measure can certainly create a barrier between the agent, host and environment. Using mosquito net/repellent, adoption of personal and environmental protective measure are some of the ways for disease prevention. Pregnant women also need to be extra cautious to make sure they are not exposed to the risk of virus infection. For instance, avoiding travel to the areas affected by the virus, practice of safe sex to prevent sexual transmission, consultation with the health service provider before planning for pregnancy etc. 

Remember the three pillars of Public Health to fight against Zika: Prevention, Promotion and Protection

Be safe and spread the word! 

Reference: Centers for disease control and prevention

Why the difference?

This week was euphoric for us Nepalese, as the Nepali lads brought home gold after knocking down the hosts India in the 12^th South Asian Games final at the Indira Gandhi Stadium in Guhati. Nepal won the title after 23 years since the 6^th SAF Games in 1993, and in the midst of the match fixing scandal, this win has promised a hopeful beginning for Nepali Football.

Team Nepal received grand welcome from the entire country as they arrived back home on Wednesday. I myself got a glimpse of the victory rally at Gaushala, where the heroes were waving from the Nepal Army truck towards the passionate fans. Oh it was amazing! I got goosebumps after hearing the roaring chants from the crowd! Nepal! Nepal! Aru bela j bhae ni, 'khelkud' le chai khatrai patriotic feel dincha! I couldn’t help but get down from the bike and take a picture. Here’s the shot I took.

It was also very generous of the Government to announce Rs. 5 lakh for each gold winner. Some of the health institutions even declared that they would be providing free health services to the players in the football team. Such reward definitely boosts the morale of the players and inspires them to thrive for even better performance.

However, it was saddening to not see the other gold medalists; Nima Gharti Magar (for Wushu) and Phupu Lhamu Khatri (for Judo) receive similar kind of treatment. Phupu Lhamu Khatri left for Hungary from Guhati itself. However, Nima Gharti did arrive at the airport but only handful of people including her family and friends were there to welcome her.

The Nepali women football team also exhibited an extraordinary performance in SAG. Though they had to settle for silver, their journey up to final has inspired many Nepali women including me. But no signs of rally or felicitations from any government officials was seen when they arrived home.

I think such differential and discriminatory behavior towards the players lowers their spirit and even make a negative impact upon their performance in future. I can confidently say this because most of us can relate this with our daily life experiences. I remember my school days, when my parents got me a watch for getting good marks in math. That got me all motivated to do better because I knew, the next time if I get better marks, I was going to get a bicycle (which I never did lol). At present, I am no longer a school going student, but I do have similar story to share. My boss recently told me that he does not even have to read the report I write, because he believes that I am good at it. Well, it was just a simple verbal statement he made, but that made me feel confident as well as more responsible towards every work I perform in the office. Be it a small or big achievement, every single one of us needs a push, a motivation once in a while to keep us going.

I hope the government will realize the importance of non-discriminatory motivation of the sports persons as these rewards and encouragement undoubtedly serves as a positive reinforcement for making them work relentlessly to put out a performance that is going to make the country proud.

I say kudos to all the players who represented Nepal in SAG. You have made us proud!

Nima Gharty Magar

Phupu Lhamu Khatri

Women Football Team arrive home
PC: goalnepal.com

Women’s Reproductive Health in the Rubble - Aftermath of the Nepal Earthquake 2015

“A 5 year old girl allegedly raped by a 42 year old man sheltering in the same football ground where the victim's family had been living under the tents in Khushibu, Naya Bazar in Kathmandu.”

“A 16 year old girl raped in Duwakot, Bhaktapur”

“A disabled woman in Sindhupalchowk...”

“A girl in Kavre...”

“A woman in Nuwakot…’ and many more.

“Nepal quake survivors face threat from human traffickers supplying sex trade. In the brothel the women and girls are forced to have unprotected sex with up to 20 or 30 men a day, seven days a week.”

The massive earthquakes that hit Nepal on April 25 and May 12 have resulted in thousands of deaths, disabilities and displacement of populations. People are forced to live out in the open, under tents and tarpaulin. According to UNFPA, more than two million women of reproductive age are affected by the disaster. The UN reports suggests that the displaced women and girls living in the temporary shelter and camps are vulnerable to sexual exploitation, rape, girls trafficking and other forms of gender-based violence, which is without doubt, increasing the risks of unwanted pregnancies. In addition to all these risks, the destruction of infrastructures by the earthquake has halted the provision of reproductive health services. With the alarming rate of sexual violence during the post-disaster situation, and the lack of access to reproductive health services, the number of unsafe abortions is likely to increase due to unwanted pregnancies.

Although majority of the health facilities have been destroyed by the earthquake, there are organizations and youth networks continuously working to reach out to the women and girls with reproductive health services. Various organizations have distributed “Reproductive Health Kits, Dignity Kits” for addressing the emergency reproductive need of women in earthquake affected areas. The ASAP team also aided the affected women through the Nepali Youth Champions by lending a helping hand to maintain their reproductive health status through a supply of Hygiene Kits.

It is an undoubtable fact that, supply of essential RH commodities (Sanitary pads, emergency contraceptives and medical abortion pills) combined with awareness raising activities can be an effective measure for maintaining menstrual hygiene, preventing the risks of unprotected sex, unsafe abortion and preventing and responding to gender based violence even during the crisis situation. Though there are numerous factors that put women’s Reproductive Health at risk, coordinated effort to fight back RH issues and Gender based violence can definitely help the women in Nepal rise from the rubble. 

Wrote this piece after the devastating earthquake in Nepal on 25th April, 2015. [Posted in the Asia Safe Abortion Partnership (ASAP) Blog on 6th November, 2015]

Good VS Evil?

The world I am in,

holds no place for the weak.

I am a virtuous soul, fragile and sick, struggling everyday to acclimate and fit.

The battleground knows it better.
My fight with the army of evil has left my one man army torn and tattered.
There is no escape from this never ending battle for the survival of the fittest.

Defeated, dejected and destroyed,
I question myself; What is the reason for my existence? Why am I even here?
I don't belong here.

All I see is darkness..blur n black it is,
like my impugnable existence.

I gave myself up to darkness.
But darkness couldn't destroy me..was it not evil?
or has my soul turned dark too?

I can feel the power within myself now.
The power of darkness.
The power of solitude.
The power of the scars from the lost battle.

The time has come for me to rise against the evil.
But this time, its the army of evil VS the one man army of EVIL

RIP BABU! Happiness on four legs!

I didn't get to say the final goodbye. Maybe that is why I had not been able to 
accept that you will not be there when I get home today. 

I remember the first time we met. A furball curled up in the corner. Baba and I brought you home and got you cleaned up. I was in grade 7 at that time..and I remember nonstop blabbering about you with my friends in school. I'm sure most of them still remember you. You were famous man!

Your first bath. First poop on the carpet haha! First visit to vet. First shoe u chewed up (it was my favorite). First family trip to Sundarijal. How amazed I was to see you swim across the river on your own. Your first best friend Mango, first love Bella, first baby Lily. The first time you were lost..five years ago, a day before Kukur Tihar. I don't know how u made it home a month later..that reunion has got to be the best moment of my life. 

We grew up together..and I started to see an image of Baba in you. Always so calm and understanding. During these 12 years, we had so many ups and downs and you were always there...listening..as if you understood everything.  

So many memories together..so many we were yet to make. It pains to see that you are gone forever..but thanks for all the memories..and thanks for visiting me in my dream today. Guess that was our final goodbye.

Babu! Rest in Peace!